Our Jewish Heritage
Dr. Lenore C. Kipper, Judaic Studies Director Emerita
Middot, Enduring Virtues and Values of Judaism
Anavah: Humility
As we approach Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur, we enter a time of reflection for ourselves as individuals, for our community, and for the Jewish People. One of the virtues especially emphasized at this time is anavah, humility. Our tradition has much to say about this, beginning in the Torah with Moses.
“Now Moses was a very humble man, more so than anyone on earth.” (Numbers 12:3)
Other Biblical personalities like Joseph, who humbled himself before his brothers, King Saul and King David, expressed humility before God. Perhaps the more greatness and power one attains, the more humility is needed. Striving to sustain humility is a lifelong process we need to work on continually, especially in the cultural environment in which we live today. It is when life is good to us, when we feel powerful and successful, that we are in danger of becoming overly proud, self-important, and boastful about our achievements.
During times of prayer, we have an opportunity to keep things in balance. By our words and our actions, we can acknowledge our sense of humility between the Eternal and ourselves. The Chasidic Rabbi Simcha Bunim teaches us:
“Every person should have two pockets so he can reach into one or the other, according to his needs. In his right pocket are to be the words, ‘For my sake was the world created,’ and in his left pocket, ‘I am earth and ashes’ (as is every person).”
In more recent times, Rav Kook wants us to recognize that humility does not mean low self-esteem. Still, no humility in daily behavior leads to arrogance, becoming haughty and boastful. Our challenge is to find the balance.
The prophet Micah reminds us:
“God has shown you what is good and what is required of you: do justly, love kindness and walk humbly with God.” (Micah 6:8)
S’leechah: Forgiveness
We often hear people say “I’m sorry” for little things that happen, but we rarely hear the expression “forgive me.” Forgiveness always involves at least two people, the one who asks to be forgiven and the one who forgives. Both gain from participating in the act of forgiveness. Forgiving those who have hurt us rather than holding a grudge is a desirable character trait. Asking someone for serious forgiveness shows that a person is ready to change their behavior. S’leechah makes it possible for a person to have a chance to change, to turn negative actions into positive ones, and turn faults into virtues.
In Genesis, we read about Joseph and his capacity for forgiveness. This famous biblical story teaches us that even after many years of separation, Joseph could forgive his brothers for the wrong they did to him by selling him to the caravan traders who brought him to Egypt and telling their father that he was dead, stricken by a wild animal. What if Joseph had a hard heart and was full of revenge? He had the power to hurt his brothers seriously. Instead, he chose to reveal himself to them, welcome them, forgive them, and rescue them, bringing them all down to Egypt.
In some families today, there are brothers and sisters, and parents and adult children, who hold grudges for many years over things that happened long ago. The resentment builds, year after year. It becomes toxic. How fortunate we are that Judaism established a time for forgiveness at least once a year to clean the slate, if only we could do it. The time of Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur gives us an opportunity to reflect, personally and communally, on the wrongs we have committed between people. Are we able to actually ask for forgiveness? The word t’shuvah, returning or repentance, is associated with the process of forgiveness. It involves admitting to ourselves that we have wronged another, feeling regret, asking the person we have hurt for forgiveness, and changing our actions in the future. Then we can ask God to forgive us, as our prayer says,
“S’lach lanu, m’chal lanu, kaper lanu. Forgive us, pardon us, grant us atonement.”
A Midrash about Forgiveness
There was once a Jewish king who had a rebellious son. The son left his father and the kingdom, and went to a far-off land. The king missed his son very much. He was sorry he had not been more patient and understanding with him. If only he would return! For many years the king sent his messengers to find the son, but they were unsuccessful.
At last, one messenger found him and reported to the king. “I found him! At first, I wasn’t sure if he was truly your son, because his appearance and his language have changed. He now looks and acts like the rest of the people in that land. Then I saw the star around his neck, and I knew it was him.”
The king sent the messenger to bring him back. But the son said, “I cannot return. I’ve been away too long.”
The king sent the messenger a second time with a special note that said, “Return to me as far as you can come, and I will come to you the rest of the way.”
So, it is with t’shuvah, returning to God and Jewish life, between Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. Take the first step, and you will find your way back to God and Judaism.
(adapted by L. Kipper)
Shanah Tovah,
Lenore